Monday finding motivation

Well it's Monday not quite morning and I am on a mission to try and organise my bedroom. This by no means an easy task we live in a one bedroom flat and every bit of spare space holds our stuff and a lot of junk. Today while still feeling a bit groggy it's mission bedroom. 

Since Christmas our bedroom has turned into a dumping ground and a complete mess. (Here is where someone would put a before picture but I'm a bit embarrassed to show it.)

Our bedroom is by no means dirty other than a pile of my husbands clothes I need to pick up its clean but the amount of stuff everywhere is starting to get to me. The main problem we have in our bedroom is the lack of storeage for clothes I have one wardrobe that I share with my husband we also have a chest of drawers that's falling apart (this is an entirely different rant) and I have a dressing table that's got alsorts of mainly mine stuff chucked on it. One other problem is being winter things like coats, jumpers, cardis and scarfs are thicker and take up more room.  Our bedroom is also the main room to hold our clothes horses to dry washing as the hallway is just too drafty to dry anything.

I kinda wish one of those programs where people go in and reorganise your stuff but that's not happening so it's down to me.  So after I post this blog I am turning off the internet putting on some motivational music (probably Greenday) and going to get organising and I am going to try to be ruthless and throw or donate anything that's no longer worn or needed. 

Wish me luck xx

General chatter

If you had £100 to spend on just yourself what would you buy? Clothes? Makeup? Shoes?

Me and my husband didn't buy each other gifts this year for Christmas and we were sat after dinner and I asked rich what would he buy if he had £100 he said a game ect. I don't no what I would buy.  I asked rich what he thought I would buy and his answer was "spend 6 hrs in the mall looking for something and then end up with stuff from lush and boots.".  That is true I love shopping I love walking around shops and looking for something even if it's not for myself it's the thrill of looking at pretty things I don't even have to be spending money I just love shops. I love watching people buying things see there happy faces as they pick up things they need. My favourite shops are big department stores where everything is under one roof I really want to go to a big American mall and just wander around looking at things and that's why it takes me so long to decide what to buy. 

When people ask you what your hobbies are can you say oh just wandering around shops?? Kinda makes you sound weird so I have decided I am going to find a new hobby but I am not sure where to start.  Maybe I could knit? Craft? Painting? I could just put it into google and see what I get? 

Oh what a bad week

Well Monday was ment to be the most depressing day of the year and for me that has gone on for the whole week. 

I woke up Monday morning for my 1st day back at work after two and a bit weeks off for Christmas and I get a phone call from my sister saying my great grandma is really poorly in hospital and it dosn't look good. I went to work and will drop in to see her afterwork but at 11am I get the news she had passed away. She was an amazing woman who has lived her life to the full to the age of 92. She never minced her words and was very straight talking if she didn't like something you knew about it and it's one of the things I found special about her. 

Also that morning I had booked an appointment with the doctor to discuss the constant headache I has all weekend and I got prescribed an increase in one medication and some migraine tablets these all did nothing I went to bed Monday sad with a banging headache.

Tuesday I woke up with the same headache and went into work and that morning was weird. I work in a small office with 4 specailist nurses and I am there secretary and usually it's the most pleasant place to work however before I arrived something had happened that made them all fall out and the atmosphere was incredibly difficult and I wasn't helping as I wasn't feeling good either. I come home to my husband rolling with tooth pain and had been sent home from college with a temperature. 

Wednesday still have a headache. I also booked in an eye test which told me my eyesight has got worse and I need new glasses. Rich had some of his infected gum taken away at the dentist and was prescribed antibiotics and told to go back on Friday for 2 teeth to be removed (rather him than me I can't walk into a dentist without feeling queasy). Didn't get any sleep this night because of headache. 

Thursday I still had my headache and decided to stay off work so I can sleep and go back to the drs. About 12 after a particularly bad moment of my headache my left side of my face went numb. My dad took me down to the gp who put my face going numb to the migraine and upped my meds more and prescribed more migraine tablets. I went home haven't eaten all day (my new PCOS diet has gone to shot this week) I made myself a hot chocolate with marshmallows and cream and toast with peanut butter and then spilt the drink all over my sofa, me and down the fan grills of my laptop. After the initial swearing and jumping around the room still holding on to the plate of toast the phone rings to give my husband his password to do the accountancy course he's signed up to that can only be done on the now hot chocolate filled laptop!! 

So I have written off this week and yesterday and today I have just done some cleaning and lying in a darkened room waiting for the pain in my head to stop. My husband had this two teeth taken out yesterday and neither of us feel like doing anything. 

Me my husband and my great grandma. I don't look particularly good in this but see how happy she looks in this photo this has helped me smile through this tough week. 

Sunday home spa

After a night of very little sleep and this morning with the headache from hell I am spending the afternoon spoiling myself. I also am going through my lush boxes I got for Christmas and cutting them to get the most out of them. Bubble bars are easy but how do you break up bathbombs??!!?? 

I started my pampering Sunday with a soak in a creamy candy bubble bath and omg I smell sooooo good and my skin is so soft. I have matched that with the vanilla dee-light body lotion from lush on my elbows and knees (they always need an extra bit of love) and the Baylis and Harding wild rose and raspberry leaf foot lotion (smells like Turkish delight mmm). I washed my hair with lushes big shampoo and after I towel dried I sprayed Aussie miracle recharge leave in conditioner. For my face I have used my origins a perfect world cleanser and soap and glory no clogs allowed face mask and found out I have ran out of face moisturiser and the closest I have is vitamin e eyecream better than nothing I suppose. Now I realise I have forgot to tone oops. 

I also gave myself a little manicure I filed and applied nail foils as the second time I have done this they have come out pretty well. 

They rest of my Sunday is going to be getting my stuff ready to go back to work tomorrow, cook tea and see what Sunday night t.v has in store. 

Can't sleep!!

Almost 1am in the morning and I am WIDE AWAKE!! So what to do when you can't sleep??? Read Facebook and think about everything going on in my head. So I am going write down every thought in my head and see if that helps with the bit sleeping. 

Firstly I have been casually reading my Facebook like i do about a 100 times a day (not even kidding I'm addicted) and I counted out of the people I went to school with I am one of 3 who dosn't have a child. I am 27 am I going to be an old mum?? Me and Richard have been trying for a baby since we went on honeymoon last May and now I notice every pregnant woman and catch myself watching more TTC videos on YouTube. I have never been jealous but wow wanting a baby makes me jealous of everyone. When we started to try I said to rich I am not going to be obsessed I am going to be relaxed and not put any pressure on myself. Well that lasted all of erm 1 month maybe. I always knew having a baby wasn't going to be easy and that I was the reason , I have polycystic overies and am overweight and over Christmas have eaten far too much. I keep looking at the scales pulling them out and putting them back away why is it the scariest number to look at? It's also the worst time of the year to feel fat because every advert on TV is about new starts and getting fitter and loosing weight.

I have a plan though I even brought a book lol (do people lol in blogs?). I have brought the ultimate PCOS handbook (written by Collete Harris and Theresa Cheung) and it's pretty good and a little bit over my head but I got to the second part total TLC for your body and the section on changing your diet sounds doable. In the book it explains the reason why people with PCOS gain weight and how to help with insulin resistance. It gives you 10 steps to take to make you healthier, it explains not to do all 10 at once and take one step at a time. So as of tomorrow I am going to start doing the 1st goal. 

The goal is to eat more often stagger your food intake so you eat every 3/4 hours to keep your sugar levels level and you don't go to bed having eaten a big meal or binge on a packet of biscuits before bed . I will stagger my meals by having breakfast as soon as I get up to get my metabolism started, having a snack at about 11, eating lunch around 2 have an afternoon snack at about 4 and having a light tea at about 7. The only person I am going to tell that is around me is Richard and he is being really supportive and going to do it aswell. I don't want to fail at something again and my family think oh yeah that's just kelly going through another "diet fad". 

I am also thinking about what kind of mum I am going to be. Me and my mum have never had the best relationship I am worried I am going to be like her. 

I want to be be mum who plays with her kids and shows them that I am there and I will be there whenever they need me and I certainly won't choose not to sit at the top table at there wedding. 

Ok just read that and this is a really long post best try and sleep. 

My 2014 plan

Having not written on my blog for about 3 months I have made it a sort of life goal (not saying New Years resolution as I fail them 100% of the time) to write regularly on my blog. As I really want to start something and see it through instead of doing it for a couple of months and then stopping for a couple. I don't think I have ever seen something through to the end since I was doing GCSE's at school. I always start these things like writing a novel that lasted all of 2hrs, making sure I cleanse, tone and moisturise twice a day that always lasts about 2 weeks and then my face feels softer and I forget. So 2014 is the year I see something till the end!! And maybe get better softer skin in the meantime. 

My other life goals this year is to loose weight, read more books (I got a plan for this), get used to being a part-time house wife (urrrggghhhh dishes) and hopefully conceive our 1st baby (fingers crossed). 

If I complete just one of these goals I don't think I will be a changed woman I am always going to be someone who starts and stops little projects but having a few competed might prove to myself that I can at least complete some goals (think that sentance ran away with me then). 

So if anybody does read this happy new year and what life goals have you set this year??